Don't Let the Door Bang You on the Ass

Jay Mariotti was the head sports writer for the Chicago Sun-Times. He recently retired from the paper, via an email, and said on television that the newspaper was dead. Well Roger Ebert wasn't so pleased and has a few words for the man. He also includes this amazing photo:

Look at that mullet!

Group Dinner 2: Asian Boogaloo

So my girlfriend and I have gotten together with her cousin and his girlfriend once before and attempted to cook a meal. I didn't take photos the first time because I was scared it would end up with a bunch of burnt food and the final being a group shot of us around a bucket of KFC. Well it went amazing and we decided to meet up again. This time we also choose a theme of Asian food. Andrea and I decided to do an appetizer and dessert, while her cousin Andy and his girlfriend Kristin made the main entrees. It went amazing and you can see all the photos here.

See Films Differently

Volkswagen has been a proud supporter of independent film for some time and they have a great series of ads in which people give VERY alternate takes on popular films (Toy Story, Die Hard, Star Wars, etc) that actually make sense. Check them out here.

My Little Ponies I Would've Owned

An artist by the name of Mari Kasurinen has created a set of My Little Pony dolls based around movie characters.

Now I Might Need a Wii

Read more here

Selections from H.P. Lovecraft's brief tenure as a Whitman's Sampler copywriter

A fun read for Friday. An excerpt:

Toffee Nugget

Few men dare ask the question "What is toffee, exactly?" All those who have investigated this substance are now either dead or insane.

I Can't Wait to get this Phone!

It's Not a Glitch, He's Just That Good

Now I Can't Wait for the Bob Sagat Roast

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

My New Favorite Blog

My girlfriend passed along this blog to me. It's all about cakes that are just horrible. So far my favorite is below. How/why was this made?

Another Thing That Will Make Me Shop At McDonald's

Are these also made in China?

Shark Week

So one of my girlfriend's co-workers created this video from footage he shot while scuba diving. Pretty pimp.

The Dark Knight Origins

These kids are cooler than I'll ever be

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Bernie Mac Dead at 50

One of my favorite comedians has died at the age of 50 due to pneumonia complications.

I remember seeing The Original Kings of Comedy in theaters and crying I was laughing so hard when Bernie Mac came out. This performance brought him to the spotlight. Shortly after this he started receiving film roles and soon enough his own show. I enjoyed his show so much I actually wrote a paper on it in college which discussed the roles of fathers in television shows.

Below is one of my favorite scenes from the movie. Most of the language is NSFW.

My Favorite Olympic Moment

I'll always remember seeing this moment on television. I've yet to see anything make me cry like a baby.



PS: Sorry for the Creed music

I Hid in my Garage

Great picture from the Chicago Tornado Scare of 2008

Charlie Lynch Found Guilty

One of the saddest injustices I've seen in a long time has occurred. Charlie Lynch has been found guilty of

distributing marijuana, conspiring to distribute marijuana and providing marijuana to people under the age of 21

I first heard of this story on Reason where I learned that in San Francisco it is legal to sell medicinal marijuana. Mr. Lynch opened a business that sold this marijuana to individuals for medicinal purposes. One of these individuals was Owen Beck, a high schooler that noticed it hurt while running when playing soccer. He went in to have an x-ray and a medium sized tumor was discovered in his leg. After many treatments of chemo and feeling nauseated therefore not eating, his parents suggested to him the use of medical marijuana. They spoke to a doctor, received the prescription, and went and visited Mr. Lynch's office. Because Owen was a minor Charlie Lynch was arrested for distributing.

Just a sad day when a man who is not pushing drugs on the corner but providing it to individuals so that they can eat is now going to jail for a long time.

Make sure to check out the entire video and story at Reason.

Does Not Compute

If you're like me you're constantly calling customer service for major corporations. And if you're like me you hate having to solve the riddle of key commands to speak to an actual human. Well thanks to wonderful world o'intertubes, you can have a Game Genie for these companies.

The website Gethuman.com contains listings of 100s of major corporations and the key combination or secret key words to say in order to get a person right away. You can also see reviews other users have left on their experience with those companies, and you can add as well.

Send a Text Without Using Your Phone

Saw this handy tip on Tekzilla recently. Want to send a text to someone but either your phone has no service, you've gone over your allotment for the month, or just hate using the number pad to find numbers? Well here are the email addresses you can use for the major cell phone providers in the US:

• T-Mobile: phonenumber@tmomail.net
• Virgin Mobile: phonenumber@vmobl.com,
• Cingular: phonenumber@cingularme.com
• Sprint: phonenumber@messaging.sprintpcs.com
• Verizon: phonenumber@vtext.com
• Nextel: phonenumber@messaging.nextel.com

I tested it and it works great.

The Simpsons Found in Nature

Classic Rock Meets Classical Music

John Carpenter's The Thing Re-Shot with G.I. Joes

via It's a Bloggy Blog World

We're Related?!

If you're like me, family reunions can be awkward. It's catching up with relatives that you see once a month/year/cicada hatching. You're not sure if they're into the same music and movies as you so it becomes a chat about weather and jobs. Awesome!

Well I heard about a site called GENi that is free and allows you to create a family tree. I think this is great for two reasons.

1. You can learn! Honestly, it is cool to see where your grandparents, great-grandparents, great-great-great grandparents, and not-so-great uncles come from.
2. It allows you to keep track of family members without being creeped out. Here's what I mean. One current way of keeping track of cousins was through Facebook. At first it was fun, but after seeing a photo of my cousin doing a keg stand, and the last memory I have of them was getting a My Little Pony for the holidays at age six, it can be a little shocking.

The other form was through blogging. And you know how bloggers are? Conceited, self-righteous, pretentious, people that think the world revolves around them and everything they say is smart. What jerks.

With GENi, you can post events that are going on in your life that you want family members to know of. You can plan gatherings or trips without the hassle of fighting over the phone, now you can email anger! You can even share photos...of keg stands if that's an achievement in your family.

So check it out and let me know if we're 5th cousins at some point.

Will this work on cars?

Golden Shellback Waterproof Coating from gCaptain.com on Vimeo.

I want to be able to drive underwater!

Join the Revolution

via YTMND

To Pee or Not To Pee

I was reading a piece in the NY Times a couple of days ago that struck near to my, uh, heart. Apparently the city of Seattle is removing all their public toilets.

In the end, the restrooms, installed in early 2004, had become so filthy, so overrun with drug abusers and prostitutes, that although use was free of charge, even some of the city’s most destitute people refused to step inside them.

Living in the City of Big Shoulders, I have asked myself plenty of times why there are no public toilets in this windy city. I first thought it was a way for the city to make money. There are three big colleges, and many smaller ones, located in Chicago proper which equates to a large number of drunk students "celebrating" their "freedom" which leads to public urination which leads to tickets which leads to revenue. I don't think there's a burrito place in the city that doesn't have the stench of PBR laced urine and vomit in the alley next to it. However, I've never seen anyone ticketed and I waited in alleys to watch.

My next thought was that it must be to prevent what is happening in Seattle. These bathrooms became dens of inequity. And why not? The door shuts behind you and no one can see what, or who, you're doing. Essentially they're alleys with privacy.

A simple way to solve this problem is to make this a pay as you go system rather than tax payer supported. As the article states:

$1 million apiece over five years, which because of a local ordinance had to be borne entirely by taxpayers instead of advertisers.

Some stupid law in Seattle made it illegal for advertising agencies to use the toilets to post ads, thus tax payers had to foot the bill. Since the toilets were now "free" anyone could use them, they became disgusting, and the tax payers no longer wanted to pay. This does not mean that citizens don't want public toilets.

In European countries they have public toilets, but they're pay as you go, literally. It costs a certain amount of money to use the toilet which allots to two minutes of time, if you want longer you have to pay more. This would make it more expensive for drug users and prostitutes.

Also, these toilets aren't some carnival-style porta-potty. They look decent and are self-cleaning, which means you don't need to see/smell/feel the last 40 attendees.

So bring on the pay-as-you-go toilets. I think a couple of bucks is worth having alleys that don't reek and not having to purchase an item in a store just to use the bathroom.

Sesame Street and 112th

This is why the internet is amazing




Via Clusterfck

PS: I know this is the second Sesame Street video

Scary Video Tuesday

Apparently these worms live inside other insects and get get as long as one meter!




via Greg

Canadians Rock, eh!

I went and saw heard Feist this past weekend on the lawn at Ravinia. If I missed this on stage, I'll be pissed.

Now if only they had something for my stapler as well

The Lock Cup

Patton Oswalt's Graduation Speech

On June 18th (my birthday!) Patton Oswalt gave a speech at his old high school. Here is the transcript of a funny and touching piece.

Yes, that is the title of the movie

5 Years

Can you believe she's put up with me for this long?! I love her and wouldn't trade a minute of it.

Finally!

Want!

I Don't Write this Blog to Make Friends

It's Called Speedstick!

I guess if you're trying to reach out to the black youth out there, maybe this works.

My Other Car is a Yacht

How can I show the world that I'm rich? A nice sports car? Nah, too many people have those. I know! This will do.

Wakey Wakey

Now this will get you up in the morning. A Taiwanese phone is currently in the design stage that if not turned off will begin to randomly dial people from your cell phone's phonebook. I'm sure they'll make sure you're up at 7:00am if they have to be.

Do you feel lucky? Well do ya?!

USA Today (the one with color graphs) has an interesting piece about scratch off lottery tickets.

Apparently those ones that have a $100,000 jackpot (or higher) may already have a winner claimed but the tickets still remain to be purchased. Their argument is:

The states say the practice is fair because lottery tickets and websites
disclose the practice. Also, other prizes are available.

So even though they're telling your there's a chance of winning a large sum of money on a giant sign by the tickets and on the front of them, the small font on the back and the chance you check the winnings website regularly allows them to keep selling these tickets.

WTF?!

Marketing? Druggies? Aliens? What is this?!

Not so hidden anymore

The Wall Street Journal has a story about what actually is refunded if your flight is cancelled. SPOLIER: It's not the taxes.

The government is "confiscating fees for services not performed," says Mr. Shecter, a personal financial consultant in Nashville, Tenn., and the practice "represents to me a nasty, backdoor method of taking money from our pockets."

And politicians wonder why no one trusts the government.

I Needed Alderman Approval to Post this

A recent op-ed in the Chicago Tribune from Reason editor Radley Balko states that of all major cities in the US, Chicago is the worst for individual freedoms. From the article:

At Reason Magazine, we recently took a look at how the 35 most-populous cities in the United States balance individual freedom with government paternalism. We ranked the cities on how much freedom they afford their residents to indulge in alcohol, tobacco, drugs, sex, gambling and food. And, for good measure, we also looked at the cities' gun laws, use of traffic and surveillance cameras, and tossed in an "other" category to catch weird laws such as New York's ban on unlicensed dancing, or Chicago's tax on bottled water.

The sad news, Chicagoans, is that your town came in dead last. And it wasn't even close.

So not only am I limited on what I can put on my hot dog, the cost has gone up to?

New Summer X Games Sport

So now swings are hardcore?! I want to laugh but I'm kinda jealous.



via Greg

I wonder what comes up if Dick Trickle wins a race?

HILARIOUS post about a filter used by the American Family Association's news gathering website. Also via Reason.

Celebrate Your Nation's Freedom by Blowing up a Piece of It

Great piece from Reason magazine on what's the big deal with fireworks and the history of how they came to be both used and then pretty much banned.

Just for old time's sake

Schmohawk!

Just caught up with every episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm and have to say the last episode of season six blew me away! If you have never seen this show, I strongly suggest you watch it. Almost all sitcoms that have documentary feel to them owe it to Larry David.

Office of Pre-Crime

So I may ruffle some feathers with this post, but when did it become illegal for just being creepy? NBC has agreed to pay the family of a Texas man $100M after he killed himself for almost being on To Catch a Predator. What shocks me the most about this story is that Louis Conradt was actually arrested for what? Saying gross things to someone online? I'll agree that what he did was gross and we shouldn't praise it by any means, but really arrest him? And from reading this article, which I realize is quite short, all I can take from the incident is that Mr. Conradt solicited a "minor" in a chat room but didn't go to the house. Wouldn't this be a sign that he possibly realized what he was doing was wrong? Isn't this what we want these people to realize? Instead, he's put under arrest and sadly takes his own life.

Is the point of his arrest to prevent him from hurting innocent children? Didn't he prevent himself? The idea of pre-crime does not interest me and seeing as he wasn't actually talking to a real child but some set-up by NBC what crime was truly committed?

AC/DC? Really?

Saw this video on my buddy Greg's blog. Pretty fun but still won't make soccer any more popular in the US.

All the li'l birds on Jaybird Steet

So I recently joined Twitter. I was hearing so much about it on TWIT and Tekzilla I felt like a loser for not having joined. So, like I handle any peer pressure situation, I joined as soon as I could. At first I wasn't too impressed. For starters, only two of my friends were "on" twitter and by that I mean they hadn't updated their page for over three months. I felt like the lonely guy at the party who was invited because he works with the hosts but doesn't really talk to them that much. After searching for people I went to grade school with as a last resort, I almost gave up on the site. That was until I realized how great it works for following companies or blogs on a regular basis. Many of my fave sites, mags, and tech-celebs are on there. By following them on Twitter I'm able to keep up on the latest news they've posted or any other notes of interest they have. I can also respond to their posts and have a conversation rather than leave a comment on some site.

I've added Opening Weekend to Twitter now. You'll now be able to see when new episodes and posts are put up. This is really helpful if you don't have an RSS reader or even know what I mean by RSS. I can also see who's following and learn more about the listeners.

So jump on and start tweeting your little heart out! (When is Web 2.0 going to stop with these cutesy webterms?)

Fool Me Once...

Seeing as my last video was a fluke, I'm not sure if I trust this new one either. Apparently its an ad for JC Penney's that was never aired. I think you'll see why. Check out the t-shirt the girl's wearing though.

JC Penny: Speed Dressing
by hourigan

Crouching Ball Hidden Girl

Ball Girl Makes Incredible Catch - Watch more free videos

That explains all the nightmares

Your favorite childhood toys revealed!

Good Night, Good Luck, and Go Blue!

One of my favorite Michigan blogs The M Zone has called it quits. Not only were these guys funny but they knew their football too. I strongly suggest checking out their take on the Appalachain State loss and their many names given to Coash Weiss.

You bring me moose and squirrel!

If you saw the new Indiana Jones movie then you'll love this abridged script. If not, reenact it with friends and you'll have a much better time and save $10.

Where Have All the Tech Girls Gone?

This great article form computerworld.com talks about the decline of women in IT offices across the US based on a study from Harvard.

One of the main reasons given is the treatment of women in these fields by the men they work with. I've always found this to be true and quite confusing. Many of the guys I know in IT are not the most outgoing. They mostly build their own computers which are souped up enough to even brew their own coffee and hardly go out. Computer gaming is fine and all, but once you start talking to these guys about women its some of the most misogynistic stuff I've ever heard. Very few think women are as smart as men and many judge women based on their looks.

Not much else to say about all this except...to the nerdmobile!

I reacted the same way

Bill playing Battletoads

Jedi Mind Tricks

My ears, mind, and heart are now officially blown

Aftershocks?!

Uh oh

So I was really concerned when the first writers strike began. Shows like How I Met Your Mother, 30 Rock, and The Office were becoming amazing good (almost Arrested Development good). Then the strike came and after seeing shows like American Gladiators and 3rd, 4th, and 19th seasons of Flavor of Love and The Bachleor(ette) arrive I thought the end was near. Was I going to have to read again?! No!!!!

So the strike ended and the shows came back, but I could tell they weren't as strong. And one of my faves, Scrubs, had a horrible season finale and is going to be moved to ABC where I hope it still holds up. This new sign of a strike isn't great, and if you're like me and are tired of seeing people eat bugs on national television to get a shot at love with the star of MySpace (is like the tallest midget?), boycott these horrible shows so their ratings go down and the stations start giving these writers what they need.

Sixty Minutes Dream Team

If CBS truly wants some ratings they should honestly do this

Just Upsetting

It's too late for me to attempt to write up something on this, but I probably will tomorrow.

I'm an Extra!

Haha! Dangly Parts.

Possible New Outkast Single

Saw this video online with the tag "New Outkast single with Raekwon" Not sure if it is but the topics they rap about seem current. It's called Royal Flush. Enjoy.

Oh the places you'll go

One of the guys from my comedy group ComCo at U of M was on the most recent episode of Hell's Kitchen. He's the red head with sideburns. He was also on MTV's Next. I'm not sure if I should be happy or sad.

Just in case you were wondering

ThingsIDidLastNight.com

Doesn't this moron know what a panda is when he sees one?

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

I would ask "What words rhyme with orange?"

The NY Times has a very cool article about some free services to use on your cell phone.

My Hands!

Not sure if this is real or not (he gets star power without lifting the guitar) but I still have a mancrush.

Lovin' LaLa

So I've been a member of LaLa.com for some time now. At first it was a way to swap CDs with other users for only a $1.75 a CD. Within two months I already had 80 new CDs. Well they've just revamped their website and you can now have an online database of songs, buy songs for only 10 cents that will play on lala.com, and for 89 cents download DRM free music. I strongly suggest jumping on board.

I Will Eat Anything For Love

My birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks if anyone is interested. These look nice.

Hillary Rodam Clinton Stern

Great piece by The New Republic that explains what would happen if Hillary were in charge of the NBA.

I still wish 'Sheed and the Pistons were in it. Go Lakers!

I'm Starting To Think There Isn't a Bomb Squad in Boston

After the horrible incident with the Cartoon Network signage, we now have a new one.

A 19-year-old MIT student who went to the Logan airport to meet a friend was so excited about the visit she created a shirt with LED lights all over it. The lights were obviously connected to a circuit board. The state troopers of Maine obviously thought this was a bomb and surrounded her with machine guns. She has now apologized for her actions. I'm not sure exactly what those actions are. She exposed the stupidity of the Boston police, AGAIN!

Go DJ!

Since I first heard my first A Tribe Called Quest song I wanted to be a DJ. So this new site Orbz is out and although it's not the greatest thing ever, it sure is fun to pretend. Here's a little jam I created in about five minutes. Imagine if I put some time into it! Click the mute/unmute words to hear it.

Def Leppard Even Sexier!

The Podcast Returns!

So Garrett and I started up the podcast again. Check it out here Same format as Three Men and a Podcast but with one man down. We miss you Andy!

Top Ten Films of 2007

...of what I've seen so far.

10. 28 Weeks Later

Just a great horror flick that asks the question, "Would you stay behind or let your wife be eaten alive if the world went crazy?" Something we all face everyday.

9. No Country For Old Men

Javier Bardem just knocked Sir Anthony Hopkins off the scary guy mountain. From scene one we're introduced to this grim reaper and then are on edge the rest of the film.

8. Live Free or Die Hard

A fun, summer action flick. Bruce Willis and the Apple guy work well together in this film. And watching Bruce hit an Asain woman with a car is pretty cool.

7. The Simpsons Movie

Spider-Pig was so great, I think he should've gotten his own movie.

6. Waitress

I didn't think I could like Andy Griffith if he wasn't playing Matlock, but he does a great job in this film as a cranky, old businessman. Sadly the writer/director was killed shortly after filming and wasn't able to even see her finished project, which is a beautiful film.

5. The Lives of Others

I didn't think it was possible, but there are good Germans. Seriously though, this is a great film about the problems of the police state and how eventhough it will turn man against man or even husband against wife, you may find friends in the least likely of places.

4. Juno

Just a well written, shot, and acted film. Why can't all movies be like this? Although many claim this to be a comedy, I think it was more emotional than that. Hell, even Jennifer Garner got me teary eyed.

3. Hot Fuzz

Simon Pegg does it again with this great comedy that shows the ridiculousness of action films, but at the same time praises them. You will not see where this one is going at all and that makes it just as fun.

2. The Bourne Ultimatum

The best triology ever. That's right Star Wars fans, you heard me. The three big scenes in this film, a cat and mouse chace scene in London, a fight scene in Morocco, and a car chase in Manhatan are filmed perfectly. I hope they make 40 of these.

1. The Lookout

If you like heist movies with great characters and one of them is the kid from Third Rock From the Sun, then you'll love this film. A good heist film requires the audience to not know where it's going. This film does that but to add to that fun, neither does the main character. Watch this and you will not be disappointed.

Films I saw but didn't make the top ten:

Zodiac

Black Snake Moan

Reign Over Me

Blades of Glory

Grindhouse

Aqua Teen Hunger Force: Movie for Theaters

Fracture

Spider-Man 3

Knocked Up

Mr. Brooks

Ocean's 13

Ratatouille

Superbad

Films I saw this year and was VERY disappointed with:

300 - A pretty lame story with mediocre fight scenes and a giant drag queen for a bad guy.

Transformers - A robot pisses on someone. Honeslty?!

Film I haven't seen yet and hope to soon:

Into Great Silence

The Host

The Namesake

The Wind that Shakes the Barley

Away From Her

Once

Fido

Rescue Dawn

Sunshine

No End in Sight

This is England

The King of Kong

3:10 to Yuma

Shoot 'Em Up

I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With

Eastern Promises

Into the Wild

The Assasination of Jesse James

The Darjeeling Limited

Michael Clayton

Gone Baby Gone

American Gangster

The Mist

I'm Not There

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

Sweeney Todd

Walk Hard

There Will Be Blood

Box Office Predictions 02/16/07

Breach




















$7 Million

Bridge to Terabithia



$18.5 Million

Ghost Rider



$30 Million

Music and Lyrics



$25 Million (includes Wednesday and Thursday)

Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls



$26 Million (Includes Wednesday and Thursday)

Last week I was very close to Norbit. I guessed $30M, it did $33M. I was WAY off on Hannibal Rising. I guessed $25M and it did only $13M. Oh well...I can always tell that a man dressed up as an overweight woman ALWAYS does well.

Box Office Predictions for 2/9/07

Norbit




















$30 Million

Hannibal Rising




















$25 Million

Let me know if you think I'm crazy or right on.

A Good Addiction

So, my new favorite website is www.lala.com This place is amazing! If you're into music, but all your CDs are in some wallet covered in dust not doing anything, join! If you're into music and want artwork and original CDs, join! I love this thing. Below is my want list...feel free to buy me some if you'd like:

Click here to get any of my CDs for $1

And here are all the CDs I own:

Click here to get any of my CDs for $1

Love this site...LOVE IT!

Everybody's Doing It

Just because I'm bored at home in Michigan during the holidays. My top ten movies of 2006 that I've seen so far:

10. Akeelah and the Bee




















9. Wordplay




















8. Brick




















7. Mission: Impossible III




















6. Thank You for Smoking




















5. Stranger Than Fiction




















4. Cars




















3. Clerks II




















2. The Departed




















1. Little Miss Sunshine

Three Men and a Podcast #14

Check out the latest episode

Listen to this podcast!

Three Men and a Podcast


HSX and More!





Three Men that know noting about raising a baby but everything about movies.





Enjoy! -- threemenandapodcast








Click here to get your own player.

Why I Don't Understand Sports

Unless you accidentally fell into a fountain and have been frozen in time for the past two days, the biggest debate in the sports world is who should be playing Ohio State University (no, I do not put "the" in front as I believe there are more than one, and it wasn't the first in the state that's round on both ends).


The battle began when #1 ranked OSU played then #2 ranked The University of Michigan (I'll use it there though). It was quoted as "The Game of the Century" and had more viewers than Top Chef...I mean Iron Chef America...I mean Gray's Anatomy (sorry I'm hungry). The game was at The Horseshoe, OSU's field, and was as close a game as many thought it would be. The Buckeyes did win, but only by three points, which many credit to being home field advantage. Keep in mind this was the only loss for Michigan...against the #1 ranked team in America.

So on the other side of the Nation, The University of Southern California (yeah, I'll give them the "the" just for fun) was starting to get some hype. They had two more games left, after Michigan's final versus OSU. USC was ranked 3 at the time and only had one loss as well. That sounds pretty decent, right? Well take into consideration that they lost to Oregon State University. That's right Oregon State. Have you even heard of this college? No? Well neither had any one else until they beat USC, a team known for football, in which should have been a throwaway for them. So USC is also with one loss, with two games left in the season: Notre Dame and UCLA. Notre Dame was the game all were talking about b/c if USC beat them, well it was pretty clear they would jump up to #2 and knock Michigan to #3. Oh well, that's how life goes. Well, wait...Michigan gets knocked down a peg b/c their only loss is to the best team in the nation, while USC lost to a school where the only student apparel you can find is in the school's bookshop? Seems odd. Well USC defeated Notre Dame...oh...and so did Michigan in it's second game of the year when the Wolverines were ranked #11 and the Fighting Irish were #2. Oh and Michigan stomped them with a victory of over 20 points. Yeah, this was football not basketball...20 points. Anyway, back to USC. They beat the overrated Notre Dame and then go onto what many thought would be a cake walk against UCLA. UCLA is known for creating actors, not athletes. Well, we were all wrong when in a giant upset, UCLA beat USC 13-9. It looks like reason does win out. So many think that Michigan is fine, and a great rematch will occur in the National Title Game. Think again.


You can't forget Florida. "Florida?" you ask. Well, so did I and many other people. All of a sudden they're going to play OSU in the national title game b/c they just won the SEC conference. Wait. "Why weren't they talking about Florida at the same time they were talking about USC?" and "What's their record?" are two questions you're probably asking. Well, I asked myself those questions as well. No one was talking about Florida at the time b/c, well, no one thought they really had any reason to be the #2 team in the US. They themselves had one loss in the season...to Auburn. "Auburn! I've heard of them!" That's right, they're no Oregon State. But keep in mind, Florida was ranked #2 when they played them, and Auburn was #11. So Florida lost to a team that they should've beaten. Well they go on to play five unranked after that and, surprise, beat them. This puts them in the SEC finals to play Arkansas (another team I'm sure you know). Well they beat them as well and all of a sudden, people think they should play OSU in the National Championship.


Here is where my confusion comes in. The University of Michigan only has one loss this season, against the best team in the nation. They didn't lose to a team that they should've beaten. Florida, on the other hand, loses to a team that is ranked nine spots lower than they are, and suddenly they're the second best team in the nation? Does this make sense?

If the point of the national championship is to have the #1 team play the #2 team, then wouldn't it make sense to have the two best teams play? OSU is obviously the best team in the nation. They're undefeated and they defeated two #2 ranked teams in the same season (they beat Texas earlier in the year). But how can anyone honestly tell me that Florida, a team that barely beat South Carolina by one point, is better than Michigan who came into the season ranked #15 and rose all the way to #2? I know many people don't want to see a rematch, but does anyone truly believe that Florida is a better team than Michigan?


Oh, and to anyone who says that the SEC has the toughest schedule, read up. The rankings of the teams that Florida played, in order, are 13, 9, 11, and 8. The rankings of the teams that Michigan played were 2 and 1. In the current BCS standings, there are 3 Big Ten teams in the top 5, all of which Michigan played.

So I'm done trying to understand sports and I'm going to go back to watching Top Chef. At least there I know that they're kicking off the worst chef.

Borat? More like Boring.

So this Thanksgiving weekend, while in my groggy-full-on-mashed-potatoes phase, I decided to go see a movie. This is a weekend that I feel almost every American not only eats like a pig, but decides to then sit in a comfortable chair for over an hour and a half to watch a movie. I was debating on either Casino Royale or Borat. One was cheesy action, and the other was an indie-comedy that was getting rave reviews and surprised everyone in the box office. I chose Borat.



Let me first say that I thought the Ali G show was hilarious, which is one reason why I wanted to see this film. I also thought the trailer looked great and for the past two weeks I kept saying, "Hello, my namea Borat." (I still chuckle at that) So I wasn't one of these people who had no idea what Sacha Baren Cohen was about or that this was like Candid Camera's evil twin...I knew what I was getting into. I ended up leaving the theater not liking what I just saw though.



I'm not sure what Sacha's point of the movie is, so I'm going to critique it on what I saw. If we're supposed to watch this movie and laugh at Americans (which I'm all for, b/c we are some stupid, funny people at times) I ended up thinking we don't look too bad in this. From what I saw, Americans are nice to foreigners no matter how strange or rude they behave. We push all stereotypes to the side and treat them with respect. I felt the character of Borat used this against us.



The movie was also unoriginal to me. He made New Yorkers look like a-holes, southeners were racist, and frat boys drink. Wow...so new. I also found it interesting that he treated the black people in the film with respect and never poked fun at them, but Jews and Christians and everyone else was up for grabs. If he wants to make fun of America, he should make fun of it all. It seemed like he was just reinforcing the stereotypes Americans already have of their country.

If you have a seen the movie and would like to read a great satirical piece on it, check out this read from the New Yorker. This is probably the first time I've ever praised the New Yorker.

Save your money and rent this, and go see Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny. I love you JB and KG.