Monday, October 23, 2006

True Fans Know Where You Live

So this weekend I went back to visit my alma mater, The University of Michigan, to watch them play the Iowa Hawkeyes in football. There's something about UM that brainwashes you into becoming the most diehard football fan ever. I have friends that came in only knowing that football was something those that picked on them in high school played, and now they wear face paint to funerals that are held on Saturdays in September though November. I love Michigan and when I can afford tickets to a game I'll go. They really need to work on this ticket thing for alumni, but that's another blog. For those of you that did not watch the game, or actually do something besides freeze and yell for three hours, the Wolverines ended up winning and kept the Hawkeyes (how sad is it that they only get on part of the Hawk to cheer for) to only six points.

This morning I'm forwarded a story from USA Today (they have color graphs!) about the Michigan coach Lloyd Carr. Lloyd's career with Michigan hasn't been spectacular, but it is no ways the worst ever. The current Michigan team came into the season ranked at 15 and has gone undefeated to move up to #2 in rankings (right behind Ohio State University, their biggest rival). In my opinion, Coach Carr deserves some kudos for taking a pretty young team and moving them up thirteen spots and getting the nation's attention. So I was surprised to read about the stalker that was sending obscene emails and looking into his, and other coaching staff's, cars.

Alright fanatics, you've got some s'plainin' to do. Let's make this simple - this is a game. Nothing happens when we lose, the University doesn't explode, the students don't lose limbs, and passerbies don't start bleeding from the eyes. Now, I get upset when Michigan, or any team I'm rooting for, loses but I had no control over it and in a couple of hours I've forgotten all about it. I can understand players getting upset at coaches, and even their family members, but just some random guy?

I feel bad for people like Coach Carr and other spotlight people (minus Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan, and the rest) for the treatments they receive. I can't believe all the things I heard while I was at the game of what Coach Carr could do with the football and his mother and parts of his body. The guy is just calling plays and I'm guessing he does a pretty good job of it as he is the coach of a Top 25 college. I'm going to throw paparazzi into this mix as well. Please leave poor George alone. The guy does some decent movies and just wants to eat his pasta in peace.

So all you stalkers out there, just realize that the actions you're taken are pushing the person you have life-size posters of in your room farther away from you. These are just normal people like you and me that make choices that we may disagree with but they don't deserve scary emails with photoshopped pictures of you and them holding a baby.

Friday, October 20, 2006

I guess that looks like Waldo

So I just read a great article in the Times about Halloween. Let me preface by saying that I am a HUGE fan of Halloween.

1. Candy...for free! I mean how can you turn this down. And it's not like it ends when were in high school. We take a few years off b/c that's SO below us...but then we remember the great mini-sized candy bars and the sugar daddies (are those sold any other time of year) and we get right back into it.
2. Pumpkin carving. Next to Michelangelo, I think pumpkin carvers are the biggest pimps in the sculpting world. To take some fat, odd vegetable and make it light up is awesome. And I know most of you like to eat them seeds know it.
3. Dressing up. The costumes I see at this time of year are great. We all have that time when we see someone with an amazing costume that we just want to give that person all of the candy in our bag because it was so brilliant.

Counting the reasons I love Halloween is like trying to list my favorite will never end. Back to the article though. It spoke on how the costumes for women during Halloween have become more of a bathing suit with a witch/nurse/ref's feel to it. I'm really confused by this. I haven't seen outfits these trashy at a strip club, but on Halloween I'll see my fair share. They're also a little too pedophilia for me (see below).

This is when the male part of my brain jumps in and says, "What are you even arguing about this for?! Isn't this the best thing ever?!" And then I hit my head and tell it to stop talking to me. It is difficult at first because every man's fantasy comes true on this day. Do you like the Tarzan-jungle like women...but sexy? Do you like the French maid...but sexy? Do you like George W...but sexy? It's a kinky person's dream.

Then reason comes in. First off, guys we're wearing a cheesy Superman costume or Chewbacca you really think that's going to get these amazing looking women turned on? I mean I know some women who have a Chewbacca fetish...but it's small. Secondly, I don't know if you've ever tried dancing, walking, or even breathing with a Halloween costume on but it's impossible. Add a mask and you're sweating and wheezing like someone with TB. Now that's sexy. Finally, it just perpetuates these stereotypes that men can do whatever they want and looks don't matter, however, if these women don't dress up then they'll be ignored at the party. Let's give credit where credit is due. It doesn't take any skill or creative thought to wear a short skirt, small top, and horns and say you're a devil. I did once see a woman dressed up as a mouse with a halo and I asked what she was. "Failed Lab Rat" is what she said. That's hilarious and creative. Those are the women that should be getting our attention.

PS: Below is my Halloween costume. Hopefully I can pull it off.